Dad jokes have a special place in the world of humor. They are simple, pun-filled, and often so corny that they make you groan before you chuckle. Whether you’re a dad looking to add to your repertoire or just someone who appreciates light-hearted, family-friendly humor, this collection of 153 corniest dad jokes is sure to brighten your day. Get ready for puns, wordplay, and classic one-liners that are guaranteed to be both eye-roll-worthy and smile-inducing.
The 153 Corniest Dad Jokes That Will Leave You Facepalming!
1. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
2. I only know 25 letters of the alphabet. I don’t know y.
3. Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
4. What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.
5. How do you organize a space party? You planet.
6. Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired.
7. What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese.
8. Why can’t your nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot.
9. What do you call a factory that makes okay products? A satisfactory.
10. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.
11. What do you call an elephant that doesn’t matter? An irrelephant.
12. Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up.
13. What do you call a belt made out of watches? A waist of time.
14. How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.
15. Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems.
16. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.
17. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.
18. What do you call a fish wearing a bowtie? Sofishticated.
19. Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.
20. How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it.
21. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
22. What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
23. Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because he felt crummy.
24. How do you catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut.
25. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato.
26. Why did the computer go to the doctor? Because it had a virus.
27. What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
28. Why did the stadium get hot after the game? All the fans left.
29. What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.
30. Why did the chicken join a band? Because it had the drumsticks.
31. What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.
32. Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out.
33. How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
34. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
35. Why did the bicycle stand up by itself? Because it was two-tired.
36. What do you call a dog magician? A labracadabrador.
37. Why did the calendar go on a diet? It had too many dates.
38. What do you call a fish that wears a crown? King Neptune.
39. Why did the scarecrow become a successful neurosurgeon? He was outstanding in his field and had a brain.
40. What do you call a snowman in the summer? A puddle.
41. Why don’t oysters donate to charity? Because they’re shellfish.
42. What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe.
43. Why did the grape stop in the middle of the road? Because it ran out of juice.
44. What do you call a man with a rubber toe? Roberto.
45. Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.
46. What do you call a fish that needs help with its homework? A tutor fish.
47. Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because it wasn’t peeling well.
48. What do you call a dinosaur that is sleeping? A dino-snore.
49. Why don’t seagulls fly over the bay? Because then they’d be bagels.
50. What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pork chop.
51. Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.
52. What do you call a snowman with a carrot nose? Frosty the nose man.
53. Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems.
54. What do you call a chicken staring at lettuce? Chicken sees a salad.
55. Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because it felt crummy.
56. What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
57. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.
58. What do you call a factory that makes okay products? A satisfactory.
59. Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired.
60. What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.
61. How do you organize a space party? You planet.
62. Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
63. I only know 25 letters of the alphabet. I don’t know y.
64. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
65. What do you call a belt made out of watches? A waist of time.
66. How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.
67. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.
68. What do you call a fish wearing a bowtie? Sofishticated.
69. How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it.
70. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
71. What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
72. Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because he felt crummy.
73. How do you catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut.
74. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato.
75. Why did the computer go to the doctor? Because it had a virus.
76. What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
77. Why did the stadium get hot after the game? All the fans left.
78. What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.
79. Why did the chicken join a band? Because it had the drumsticks.
80. What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.
81. Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out.
82. How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
83. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
84. Why did the bicycle stand up by itself? Because it was two-tired.
85. What do you call a dog magician? A labracadabrador.
86. Why did the calendar go on a diet? It had too many dates.
87. What do you call a fish that wears a crown? King Neptune.
88. Why did the scarecrow become a successful neurosurgeon? He was outstanding in his field and had a brain.
89. What do you call a snowman in the summer? A puddle.
90. Why don’t oysters donate to charity? Because they’re shellfish.
91. What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe.
92. Why did the grape stop in the middle of the road? Because it ran out of juice.
93. What do you call a man with a rubber toe? Roberto.
94. Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.
95. What do you call a fish that needs help with its homework? A tutor fish.
96. Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because it wasn’t peeling well.
97. What do you call a dinosaur that is sleeping? A dino-snore.
98. Why don’t seagulls fly over the bay? Because then they’d be bagels.
99. What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pork chop.
100. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato.
101. Why did the computer go to the doctor? Because it had a virus.
102. What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
103. Why did the stadium get hot after the game? All the fans left.
104. What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.
105. Why did the chicken join a band? Because it had the drumsticks.
106. What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.
107. Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out.
108. How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
109. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
110. Why did the bicycle stand up by itself? Because it was two-tired.
111. What do you call a dog magician? A labracadabrador.
112. Why did the calendar go on a diet? It had too many dates.
113. What do you call a fish that wears a crown? King Neptune.
114. Why did the scarecrow become a successful neurosurgeon? He was outstanding in his field and had a brain.
115. What do you call a snowman in the summer? A puddle.
116. Why don’t oysters donate to charity? Because they’re shellfish.
117. What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe.
118. Why did the grape stop in the middle of the road? Because it ran out of juice.
119. What do you call a man with a rubber toe? Roberto.
120. Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.
121. What do you call a fish that needs help with its homework? A tutor fish.
122. Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because it wasn’t peeling well.
123. What do you call a dinosaur that is sleeping? A dino-snore.
124. Why don’t seagulls fly over the bay? Because then they’d be bagels.
125. What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pork chop.
126. Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.
127. How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it.
128. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
129. What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
130. Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because he felt crummy.
131. How do you catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut.
132. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato.
133. Why did the computer go to the doctor? Because it had a virus.
134. What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
135. Why did the stadium get hot after the game? All the fans left.
136. What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.
137. Why did the chicken join a band? Because it had the drumsticks.
138. What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.
139. Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out.
140. How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
141. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
142. Why did the bicycle stand up by itself? Because it was two-tired.
143. What do you call a dog magician? A labracadabrador.
144. Why did the calendar go on a diet? It had too many dates.
145. What do you call a fish that wears a crown? King Neptune.
146. Why did the scarecrow become a successful neurosurgeon? He was outstanding in his field and had a brain.
147. What do you call a snowman in the summer? A puddle.
148. Why don’t oysters donate to charity? Because they’re shellfish.
149. What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe.
150. Why did the grape stop in the middle of the road? Because it ran out of juice.
151. What do you call a man with a rubber toe? Roberto.
152. Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.
153. What do you call a fish that needs help with its homework? A tutor fish.
Conclusion
There you have it: 153 dad jokes so corny, they might just become your new favorites. These jokes are perfect for lightening the mood, breaking the ice, or just sharing a laugh with family and friends. Whether you’re a seasoned dad joke teller or a newbie, this collection is sure to inspire plenty of smiles and maybe a few groans. Remember, the best dad jokes are the ones shared with a smile and a wink, so go ahead and spread the cheer!
