Dad jokes are famously corny, often causing eye rolls and groans, but they also bring a special kind of humor that’s uniquely dad. However, some dad jokes stir a bit more controversy—whether because of their punny wordplay, unexpected twists, or just how boldly silly they are. This article dives into 111 of the most controversial dad jokes that toe the line between hilarious and questionable. Get ready to chuckle, cringe, and maybe debate which ones are truly funny or just plain bad.
111 Controversial Dad Jokes You’ll Regret Laughing At
1. What do you call two monkeys that share an Amazon account? Prime mates.
2. What kind of noise does a witch’s vehicle make? Brrrroooom.
3. I tell dad jokes, but I don’t have any kids. I’m a faux pa.
4. Why can’t you trust an atom? Because they make up everything.
5. Justice is a dish best served cold. If it were served warm, it would be just-water.
6. I was going to tell a time-traveling joke, but you guys didn’t like it.
7. Shouldn’t the “roof” of your mouth actually be called the ceiling?
8. Why did the baby strawberry cry? Because its mother was in a jam.
9. Why couldn’t the toilet paper cross the road? Because it got stuck in a crack.
10. Stop looking for the perfect match…use a lighter.
11. I told my doctor I heard buzzing, but he said it’s just a bug going around.
12. What kind of car does a sheep like to drive? A Lamborghini.
13. What do you call someone who won’t stick to a diet? A desserter.
14. What did the accountant say while auditing a document? This is taxing.
15. What did the two pieces of bread say on their wedding day? It was loaf at first sight.
16. If you see a burglary at an Apple store, you become an iWitness.
17. If the early bird gets the worm, I’ll sleep in until there’s pancakes.
18. Why do melons have weddings? Because they cantaloupe.
19. I signed up for a marathon, but how will I know if it’s the real deal or just a run through?
20. When you have a bladder infection, urine trouble.
21. What did the drummer call his twin daughters? Anna One, Anna Two!
22. What did the juicer say to the orange during self-quarantine? Can’t wait to squeeze you!
23. What do you call a toothless bear? A gummy bear!
24. Want to hear a joke about construction? I’m still working on it.
25. Someone told me that I should write a book. I said, “That’s a novel concept.”
26. Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, “Do you know how to drive this thing?”
27. How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
28. Why should you never throw grandpa’s false teeth at a vehicle? You might denture car.
29. Why are Christmas trees bad at knitting? They always drop their needles.
30. What did the lunch box say to the refrigerator? Don’t hate me because I’m a little cooler.
31. What do you do to have a space party? You planet.
32. Why couldn’t the tree get on his computer? Because he could not log on.
33. What’s a skeleton’s favorite type of road? A dead end.
34. What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, just a little wine.
35. What did the alien say to the landscaper? Take me to your weeder.
36. Me: “I want to write when I grow up.” Dad: “Why don’t you left instead?”
37. How many apples grow on an apple tree? All of them.
38. What did Elvis say to his landscaper? Thank you for the mulch!
39. Why didn’t the lifeguard save the hippie? He was too far out!
40. What did the mother broom say to the baby broom? Time to go to sweep.
41. The other day I was attacked by a bunch of circus clowns in a parking lot. I won though, cause I went right for the juggler.
42. I’d like to shout out sidewalks for keeping me off the streets.
43. What did the computer go to the doctor? Because he had a virus.
44. How many ears does Captain Kirk have? Three. The left ear, the right ear, and the final front-ear.
45. Did you hear about the famous pickle? He’s a really big dill.
46. I went on Amazon to buy a lighter but all they had were 3,472 matches.
47. What do you need to make a highway in an art studio? A mile marker.
48. Why is Peter Pan always flying? Because he neverlands.
49. How do you get a good price on a sled? You have toboggan.
50. How can you tell if a tree is a dogwood tree? By its bark.
51. I used to hate facial hair, but then it grew on me.
52. What do you call a hot dog on wheels? Fast food!
53. Where do young trees go to learn? Elementree school.
54. Did you hear about the circus fire? It was in tents.
55. Can February March? No, but April May!
56. How do lawyers say goodbye? We’ll be suing ya!
57. Wanna hear a joke about paper? Never mind—it’s tearable.
58. What’s the best way to watch a fly fishing tournament? Live stream.
59. Spring is here! I got so excited I wet my plants.
60. I could tell a joke about pizza, but it’s a little cheesy.
61. When does a joke become a dad joke? When it becomes apparent.
62. I wouldn’t buy anything with velcro. It’s a total rip-off.
63. What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho Cheese.
64. I’m afraid for the calendar. Its days are numbered.
65. You think swimming with sharks is expensive? Swimming with sharks cost me an arm and a leg.
66. Do you want a box for your leftovers? No, but I’ll wrestle you for them.
67. What do you call a pony with a sore throat? A little hoarse.
68. How much does it cost Santa to park his sleigh? Nothing, it’s on the house.
69. Why are skeletons so calm? Because nothing gets under their skin.
70. The rotation of the earth really makes my day.
71. Why do dogs float in water? Because they are good buoys.
72. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
73. What do you call a can opener that’s broken? A can’t opener.
74. I always knock on the fridge before I open it. Just in case there’s a salad dressing.
75. Somebody just threw a jar of mayonnaise at me. I was like: “What the Hellman!”
76. My wife told me to take the spider out instead of killing him. Went out. Had a few drinks. Nice guy. He’s a web designer.
77. What do you call a constipated detective? No shit, Sherlock.
78. Yesterday, I was washing the car with my son. He said: “Why can’t you just use a sponge like a normal Dad?!?”
79. My wife asked me to stop singing ‘Wonderwall’ to her.
80. Are you feeling cold?
81. What’s the difference between ignorance and indifference? I don’t know and I don’t care.
82. Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.
83. Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 ate 9.
84. People are usually shocked when they find out I am not a good electrician.
85. I constructed a model of Mount Everest, and my son inquired, “Is it to scale?” I responded, “No, it’s for looking at.”
86. Have you heard about the restaurant on the moon? It has excellent food but lacks atmosphere.
87. What did one wall say to the other? “Meet you at the corner.”
88. Why is Yoda such a skilled gardener? He possesses green thumbs.
89. I decided to connect all my wristwatches to create a belt; it turned out to be a real waste of time.
90. I was let go from my job as a taxi driver because customers don’t appreciate it when you go the extra mile.
91. Did you know that the original French fries weren’t actually prepared in France? They were cooked in Greece.
92. I asked dad for best dad, and he replied, “You.”
93. Why was the woman dissatisfied with the Velcro she purchased? It was a complete rip-off.
94. Why did the golfer get a new pair of pants? Because he got a hole-in-one.
95. How long is a piece of string? Twice as long as half of it.
96. My wife was sick of my bad sense of direction. We always fought about it. So I packed up my bags and right.
97. Why did the old man fall in the well? Because he couldn’t see that well.
98. Did you hear about that person who was afraid to jump a hurdle? They got over it.
99. Why are peppers the best at archery? Because they habanero.
100. What’s the easiest way to burn 1,000 calories? Leave the pizza in the oven.
101. What do you call a hippie’s wife? Mississippi.
102. When did they find water on the moon? When it was waning.
103. What’s the difference between a “Dad joke” and a “bad joke”? The direction of the first letter.
104. I have a joke about banking, but I lost interest.
105. To the person who stole my place in line: I’m after you now.
106. Where should you never take a dog? The flea market.
107. What do you call a shoe made out of a banana peel? A slipper.
108. I have a joke about time travel, but you guys didn’t get it.
109. Can a frog jump higher than a house? Of course. A house can’t jump.
110. How do you make a fire with two sticks? Make sure one’s a match.
111. How do you fix a broken tomato? With tomato paste.
Conclusion
Controversial dad jokes walk a fine line between clever wordplay and groan-worthy puns. Whether they make you laugh out loud or just shake your head, these 111 jokes prove that dad humor is alive, well, and sometimes a little edgy. So next time you want to break the ice or lighten the mood, try one of these jokes—just be ready for the mixed reactions they might bring!
